Burnout is real and it's a struggling journey that I've been on for the past few months. I feel like I've lost my love for writing and at the same time, lost a bit of myself.
If you know me at all, you know that I am extremely type A, I love being organized, getting things crossed off a to do list, and working hard. Lately, all of that has just gone away. I find it hard to get to my computer everyday, get excited to get my work done, and each time I finish my work day, I feel utterly exhausted.
In addition to the burnout, it's been causing some real issues in my health and wellness. I've been going to bed super late, not sleeping through the night, and not eating right. I'm not sure wether the burnout is to blame or if this is just another factor that is causing burnout. Either way, something has to change.
I am a list maker, I always have been. So this morning, I decided to make a list of all the things I can do to get my life back on track. I've come up with the following: eat a healthy breakfast, take the dog for a walk, turn off the computer at 5:00 PM, clean the house fully once a week, and always take time for myself on the weekends.
I guess part of the burnout and anxiety is also the news cycle currently. I am proud to be an American, but lately that pride has taken a bit of a blow. From the issues surrounding gun violence, to the overturning of Roe v. Wade, I can't help but feel anxious about all the horrible things going on in this country. I am not a political person in the least bit, but I'm scared and frustrated.
It brings me back to a time when I first started writing for newspapers. I was covering the beat that nobody wanted with school boards, taxes, town council, police and fire, etc. All the negative things in the world that nobody wants to deal with. It was at that point in time that I was also stressed, suffered from severe anxiety and depression, and had a hard time sleeping. I knew back then that I needed to make a change.
This feels oddly similar to how I am feeling now. My work doesn't excite me like it used to. I make excuses for how I'm feeling to make it seem like it's just something silly. The truth is, I'm burnt out, the world is burnt out, and it all affects me.
In addition to that list of what I could do to make my life better, I also sat down and wrote out a list of all I have to be grateful for. Here's that list: a loving family, compassionate pets, the best friends a girl could have, a few vacations on the radar, my physical health, a job that helps spread positivity, a warm bed, a roof over my head, a new car, and a good heart and head on my shoulders.
Sometimes, it's hard to not feel like the world is falling apart right before your eyes. In order to snap out of this burnout phase, I felt the need to write this blog to share that writing is still my favorite thing to do and its okay that life right now is causing speed bumps in the way. However, speed bumps just mean you have to slow down, it's not a stop sign. I'll get through this burnout period just like I get through everything else: with all the blessings in my life.
Signing off,
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